January 2023 Recap

Episode 029
Duration 24 min

This episode provides a recap of the last three episodes from January 2023, including Josh Painter, Rocky Russo and Andy Zurcher.


Welcome back folks. Got a new type of episode today that I'm experimenting with, something I'm excited about. This will be a recap episode where I share some key insights and perspective from the last three episodes. This will be great if you missed those episodes or you simply just wanna recap more rapid fire version of the content.

So today I've got a recap from January, 2023 episodes. Let's start with episode 26, realizing your best version with Josh Painter. Josh just launched a new book called Best Version Ever, which is awesome. He gave us a lot of powerful insights around what it means to become our best version.

Looking through the show notes, we started off with a little discussion around setting goals. Josh explained a 10,000 hour rule of mastering something. He also shared some really cool and fun perspective around how he's been immersed in drumming lately, and that's been giving him a lot of energy, a lot of life.

We talked about his book launch, uh, learning a little bit how his in-person events powered the book and now he's doing the opposite. He's gonna use the book to power more of his events. He's also in a transition where, because he gave so much focus to the book in the previous 12 months, he's transitioning back to focusing on family.

Josh also shared that he severely underestimated what it takes to write a book, so it was a massive effort that had a huge reward at the end, but it was a journey that required a lot of him. The book itself, the concept is becoming the best version of ourselves.

So some of the things that came up in that episode were, what's the purpose of life? Answering that big question. And Josh gave some really nice insight that we get to decide. So a lot of people wander around waiting for their life purpose to hit them or stumbling around, including myself. I went through a journey in that process, whereas he gave us a really nice understanding and power to say we can choose.

Life is not a predetermined thing from his lens. It's unique for everyone. It's very fluid. It can change and it essentially offers as a palette to make it whatever we want it to be. . So I thought that was an awesome part of the episode.

Josh also had some cool insight around seeing to believe. So we discussed how a lot of times we can't really believe something until we see it. And he explained that there's so much happening in the world, in the universe that we simply can't see. So being open and being ready for things to lean into them, to believe them that we can't see is a powerful way to embrace a growth mindset. And fuel that best version of yourself.

We talked about goal setting. Wanting to do more, become more, have a clear eye on milestones. This is all part of goal setting and achievement, and weaves into becoming the best version.

Another thing we discussed, which is really important was rests and breaks. So when you're on this journey of becoming your best version and living that authentically, and also just, hitting goals and milestones, it's important to take breaks. It's important to find rest.

And one of the things he mentioned is that when you get bored or you're pushing yourself to the limits that can often be an indication that your body is telling you, Hey, it's time for rest. It's time for a break, which I thought was really powerful because I've experienced that in my own life as well.

You know, having foot on the gas constantly comes with a consequence. And really listening to your body, not your mind, on when it's time to take a break and rest for a bit.

Another cool thing that came outta Josh's episode was this nice little sort of saying, " you spot it, you got it." So Josh found this through the lens of his wife and the idea is that when we see things in our loved ones that trigger us, it's often a reflection of us. It's a reflection of things we do, that we don't like that we're insecure about, et cetera. And so I really like that simple statement to remind ourselves if something triggers us, especially with loved ones, just being mindful that, Hey, "you spot it, you got it."

We talked about introversion. Josh shared some, some interesting insights around being the class clown as a kid, and then transitioning into more of an observer, so, and becoming a bit more quiet. And then in his friendships, oftentimes people would think that they, he didn't like them because he was so quiet until they got to know each other, and then he, he couldn't stop liking them. He couldn't stop talking to them. So he had some fun with that.

He also mentioned something that was pretty cool when we, we talk about holding space for introverts and extroverts is, being extroverted is often a practice in a habit like anything else we want to learn.

And so while I truly identify as more of an introvert, that really resonated with me that sometimes being more extroverted is a skill I have to cultivate. Like showing up and feeding into groups and getting energy from groups. Whereas it's, it's a lot easier for me to just do that in isolation as an introvert.

Josh talked about the spotlight effects . From his perspective, we're all experiencing the world as if we're the this main actor in a movie of our life.

And so a lot of times our thoughts, our emotions, our perspectives revolve around this spotlight effect. Like it's all about us. When in reality everyone else has that. And we play this supporting role for many people, especially loved ones or close friends in our lives.

And he, he represented that with the photo analogies it. Someone takes a picture and then shares it with you, immediately we go to finding ourselves in the picture, not necessarily looking at everyone else. So that was a really cool mental model there as well.

Josh talked a bit about force public speaking, meaning getting out of your comfort zone and getting into environments like unique events with strangers and people you, you aren't familiar with. It forces you to get in these situations where you're sharing, you're opening up and you're being vulnerable and more authentic. And by doing so, not only does this create really quick, genuine connection, but you start to enjoy it. And that lands with me as well.

I've stepped into events these last several years not knowing what would happen. A lot of uncertainty, a lot of fear, and then realizing that I was in an environment with similar people who also forced themself into this place where there may be some speaking, some sharing, some vulnerability, and it just creates this magic that actually can become quite addictive.

Last we talked about this ocean metaphor. So the book design of Josh's brand new book has an ocean, and he talked a lot about how oceans have this process of massive buildup, buildup, and then they crash and explode. And then it starts all over. The cycle resets.

So you go from being quiet, to having momentum, a rising tide evolves, and then build, build, build. And then it crashes. And I thought that was so cool that I even wrote a blog post about this just to reflect a little bit more on how I filtered that ocean metaphor f or projects in our lives.

And we wrapped with him sharing some cool details around the Innocence Project. This is a nonprofit that he has contributed to for years, and it, it helps people who are stuck on death row sometimes for 30 plus years, who are truly innocent, but got, uh, wrongly accused and placed in, in jail. And then essentially death row. And how time is so precious and protecting it and using it, investing it is essential, especially as it relates to showing up as our best selves.

So in summary, Josh's episode really forced me to think about what my best version is and how I can cultivate that through my daily actions. I also think the balance between goals and rest is key to living a healthy and more purpose driven life.

So I just appreciate Josh for his book, the events that he runs, and just the space that he's creating to help other people on their journey.

Next episode 27. Be light with Rocky Russo. This was an awesome episode where Rocky shared some powerful insights around self-love and living more authentically, which is a topic I love.

So it was such uh, joyful experience just jam with Rocky. We have a lot of similarities, but he has such a fascinating story and some of the things that came outta that episode. Rocky started. Strong with a powerful quote. How we do anything is more important than specific identities. So when he introduced himself, he referenced all these different identities, but he's more grounded in how he does things, how he shows up.

And as a result of that, Rocky represents light and love. So he's an empowerment and intentional living coach. He's on this life mission to be an infinite flow of light, shining a path to self-love.

And he has this amazing story of how he, he represents this sort of slingshot of life experiences having successful previous career at a big box gym, reached the highest level in the corporate ladder and just realized he had fallen so far out of love with everything that he was once passionate about. So he had this sort of cookie cutter dream life from other people's perspective, but something was off.

And so he took this four year monkship. And what he calls happily dating himself, getting to know himself again at a very intimate level and all kinds of things came up in this process. He started building a tiny home in Hawaii, which he now lives in part-time and rents out an Airbnb. He learned to trust people.

So one of his things is a huge lesson of trust, is recognizing that the right people will show up during the right times to help, which I thought was awesome. And he saw this, he saw this in the Hawaiian culture. He saw this through friends and family that were a part of his journey in finding himself, building a tiny home, leaning into coaching, lean into community.

So after this four year process, Rocky had to basically reintegrate into society. So he was off grid for most of this time. He was disconnected from, you know, the normal social things, and he leaned back in. He leaned back into the yoga world, which gave him a bunch of gift. And different people showed up there.

And he started to lean back into people and sources that gave him energy and helped him show up the way he wanted to show up, the way that it felt like his true self.

Another big topic in Rocky's episode was community. He started with this beautiful quote. We're all just walking each other home, which is just one of the coolest quotes in how humans support each other, how we can be friends and peers and students and mentors through the lens of coaching each other. And it doesn't have to be this rigid, like, I'm your coach and listen to me, but more just we're all supporting each other.

We're creating this container, this community. He, you know, he had some awesome notes here. Everyone's gifts matter. He's building a community that if you wanna belong, come on in. You know, creating a tribe where people feel like they're truly part of something. And where the ego takes a backseat.

Part of Rocky's history is fitness. And so he's realized in building community and being a coach, that fitness is a great key that opens the door to so much more. And so as we talk about a, a holistic view of wellness, which is what Rocky teaches and lives, it's more than just fitness, but fitness is often a way to open that door.

So when we look at our, our fitness or our, our physical. There's things that we can adjust and fine tune, but oftentimes there's something even deeper, you know, whether that's trauma or what they call tap roots. So him and his team use this term tap roots, that once they find the tap root of why your flower's not blooming, they can pull that out and they can actually start to work on self-care and progress and, and help people really and get the benefits out of life coaching.

So a lot of really good stuff in that episode. If you want to go back and listen on how he's cultivating that community. Fitness was kind of the cornerstone, but it's led to so much more and they're really helping people become more alive and express their gifts.

Then we talked about retreats. So Rocky throws these awesome retreats through his company called Crave, which stands for Community Reverence, Awareness, Vulnerability, and Empowerment. Their tagline is, "Nourish Your Purpose," which is so cool.

And basically the Crave is kind of this three part model where first they have attendees do the work before they arrive. So that's in the form of like building a vision, um, doing a little bit of pre retreat work so that they kind of have what they call their life blueprint, which consists of core values, life mission, life, vision, all that good stuff.

Then while they're at the retreat, they're doing the work. So they're doing group exercises together. They're doing things that are intentionally designed by Rocky and his team to be in that experience, to be in that environment.

And then finally, there's the reintegration work after the retreat. So once they leave the retreat, there's follow ups with his team. There's an intentional process to make sure that it doesn't stop when you get home, which I think is awesome. So crave retreats, check those out. I will be checking them out and hopefully attending one in the future.

Rocky's also got a podcast that he calls the Antidote, and he started this because he just wanted people to be able to tune in at any point in their or their day and just feel a little love is what he called it. Feel a little loved up on him, feel a little bit better, feel a little bit healed. And his podcast is awesome.

I had the privilege of joining him for an episode. He's just bringing, you know, warm messages to the world. And it's just a reflection of him tuning into the light that he wants to create. So I, I love that. Rocky's podcasting as well.

And then we wrapped on talking a little bit about living off grid in Hawaii. Uh, my wife and I are personally jealous of that. We have this fascination with Hawaii, so it was, gave me a lot of energy just learning on his process and how he did it. And what was really cool is that he has this place in Hawaii that was part of his journey. So he owns a little bit of land in this tiny house that he built and he goes there.

He has the, let me say, he has the ability to go there whenever he wants cuz he also spends a lot of time living in California. But he actually goes there when he feels it, which I thought was so cool. So he mentioned like he doesn't really know why or what . Or when he needs to go on this like structured schedule.

But instead he just tunes into his nervous system and his nervous system informs him when it's time to go back and get some space there in Hawaii, which I thought was beautiful.

So in summary, Rocky's episode was a powerful example of finding ourselves again, which I talk about a lot. I think most people get stuck in a life they didn't truly choose, and they just start going through the subconscious movements.

Whereas Rocky took a step back, a big step back to really reset and become super intentional about the life he wants to live. And now he's fulfilling this, this chosen mission and helping a lot of people in the process. So major props to Rocky for how he's doing that and showing up.

Finally episode 28, Sports Leadership and Kidiosity with Andy Zurcher.

So Andy is a good friend. Um, an early friend I made when I moved to Colorado almost 12 years ago. And he's a native Colorado in, which is actually rare. So he is got this beautiful family of four kids who are mostly grown at this point. And Andy's background is so interesting because he has this, this athletic background where he was a star tennis player at Notre Dame D one, which allowed him to travel the world.

He also has deep experience in technology, so that's where we met. He and I worked at a company that called Home Advisor now, which is previously called Service Magic years ago. And he's got so much talent and wisdom in the product side of building and managing technology products. And so we talked about all kinds of things.

A bit about his experience in being raised as an athlete and going through those motions of playing different sports. Then competitive tennis, which allowed him to travel the world. He shared how he also today has, has created through the help of friends and family, different things in the realms of coaching.

Like he runs the High Rocky Ski Club, which is where they take three to 400 kids up to veil every Saturday and teach 'em how to ski. Just to be that mentorship in people's lives and teach youth how to, uh, engage in skiing, which is a beautiful activity. He's coached different sports.

He still runs a March Madness tournament, which I think is so cool, a bracket. And, you know, on the topic of sports and, and doing things like that, he brought up this really cool story about how when he was growing up and his family would get together, the topic would come up.

Hey, what'd you think about this team? Or what'd you think about that game? And it wasn't about the game. It was actually a way for his family to say, I love you. And I thought that was so cool that he shared a bit of his family culture and how sports can be that powerful anchor that connects us.

He's part of the Positive Coaching Alliance out here in Colorado, which is a really cool organization that is involved in coaching at a high level and how to facilitate better, more effective coaching in our communities.

He shared some cool stats around coaching. You know, we talked how coaching youth sports is a great canvas for life preparation. It gives kids all these skills as they grow and mature. How to handle situations and act in social environments.

70% of kids drop out of sports by the age 10. I thought that was fascinating. So, so many kids are started young. Involved in sports engaged and then by 10 years old, the majority of them fall out. And one of the things that we discussed is like so many coaches and parents apply pressure to the outcome winning, right?

And. , Andy shared that a lot of the goodness, the greatness happens when you don't win. A lot of the insights actually come when you don't win. That's where we learn, where we fail, where we understand humility. This is something that's so present in my household. Like my son Everest is so competitive. He loves sports. Seven years old, it lights him up, but... winning is a big deal for him and his emotions flare up when he doesn't win.

So I thought that was an extraordinary insight. And just coming back to people who focus on the process of the game, the process of the sport arguably end up with the most success. So putting your ego down and just being in the experience, being in the, the sport itself, the game is where the real value is.

Then we wrapped up talking about Kidiosity. So this is a passion project and startup that Andy brought to life with his co-founder Will. And it's essentially a web and mobile app that allows for better facilitation for parents and kids to have quality time together.

So imagine logging into Kidiosity. It has different conversation starters, activities, topics, and it's designed to help you engage with your kids. To help kids and parents really interact in an an authentic and meaningful way instead of the plethora of other distractions that life can throw at us. So I really love and admire this mission.

I think it's something that the world needs and I honor the courage it takes to not only just do a startup, especially in a full life where he is got family and, and career and all these competing priorities, but just the depth that it takes to bring something to the world that might not be the flashiest, sexiest thing as we talked about.

So I love this mission. We talked as well how that relates to building startups. So, Andy's had deep experience in technology for years, as I mentioned, and then doing this was his first experience really founding something from the ground up, meaning he raised a little bit of money, but poured most of his own cash into it.

And he had to take this journey where, from his words, you never really know what you're gonna learn until you're in it. And so he shared that this was one of the most challenging things he's ever done. And while he doesn't even know if he feels the startup itself is wildly successful, he does know with conviction that it was certainly a successful vehicle that he learned so much about himself from, which I think is an awesome insight.

There's just so much wisdom there. . And like I said, courage. You know, being an entrepreneur can be lonely, especially starting something from the ground up, and you don't really understand the nature of these things until you're in it and you're doing it, and so I really admire Andy's courage to get in there and build something beautiful.

In summary, Andy's episode reminded me of how important the role of coaching and sports have with our youth, with our children. Like I mentioned before, I'm seeing this as we speak with my son Everest. Like he's obsessed with football. We're playing living room soccer on a daily basis. We're moving our bodies, and he's just learning so much about himself.

He's learning things about how sports are organized and coordinated. He's starting to ask questions like, well, Why do these guys show up? Are they paid? Like what is the dynamic between team and coach and the big arena that we go to?

So there's all this learning in sports and it really gave me some good things to think about on like, what is our role? What are we really trying to do as coaches and leaders, and how can sports be a vehicle, something we can leverage for that.

I also deeply admire Andy's courage to build Kidiosity, and I'm gonna be an advocate for that. I think anything that allows parents and children to have more quality time is essential and something we need today. So major props to Andy and Will for creating that.

And that's a wrap, three episodes in January. I appreciate all three of these guests for showing up and creating space to share their stories. I also appreciate you for giving this space in your life. Until the next episode, we'll catch you next week.

Ali Jafarian

Ali is a creator and coach who's passionate about guiding people to their truth. That's a fancy way of saying he wants to help people realize their most authentic life. He's a family man, entrepreneur, conscious technologist, explorer, podcast host and many other things that inspire him to stay curious and learn. He's also a huge advocate for nature, hiking, adventure, testing physical limits and experiencing the natural world.