This simple question can be an effective tool in your personal relationships. It provides common language to express the emotional support we’re seeking on a topic or situation.
If someone comes to you with a problem or issue, you pause and ask them:
“Do you want me to fix it or feel it?”
By asking this question, you set the context for two types of emotional support:
Fix it
In this scenario you are holding space with the intention of providing feedback or solutions to the issue. You are engaged to help solve something.
Feel it
In this scenario you are holding space with the intention of feeling the issue. You are not trying to help solve anything, but rather listening with as much empathy and compassion as possible.
Discussion